When Cowboys running back Joseph Randle stole underwear and cologne from a Dallas-area department store earlier this month, we're pretty sure he had females on the mind.
And when he got pinched for his theft he didn't stop thinking that way, police footage from the booking reveals. In fact, Randle tried to pay a lady police officer 100 bucks for a massage. Cash which would have been better spent on the underwear and cologne he stole, obviously.
After being rebuffed in his attempt to create a scenario which only exists in old school pornography, Randle worried about looking good in his booking photo, and about whether or not the Cowboys would cut him for his comic misdeeds.
He reasoned that they wouldn't since his teammate Josh Brent -- who was convicted of vehicular manslaughter -- is still on the team.
So far he has been correct, and it's doubtful this video will change that. Although it will probably give Jerry Jones and company a good chuckle, like it has the rest of us.